“HE Who Finds a Good Wife”: Key Word ‘HE’
A young lady approached me at one of my Youth Seminars and she asked me this question, “I want to ask a guy out. How long should I wait until I do?” I told her, “It’s not your job to ask him out. It’s his.” She then replied, “Yeah but I’ve been waiting (she proceeded to count on her fingers) like four years. What if he doesn’t ask me?” I then responded with, “It’s still not your place and then it simply means he is not for you. You could wait ten years, eight years, whatever years. It doesn’t matter how long you wait. If he is not for you, he’s not for you.”
We have lived in an age where women are told, “Go for yours!” I believed this for a long time and ended up being heart broken, embarrassed, and utterly confused. It is not our place to make the first step. If we look to Jesus as an example, in 1 John 4:19 it states, “We love because he first loved us.” Men must make the first step and we must allow them to take the lead. Let’s face it ladies, we are usually a hundred steps ahead of them to begin with. It takes a little time for them to catch up…okay maybe a lot of time (according to our calculations).
Have you ever heard, “Oh he doesn’t know what he wants”? Well, he actually does. We may not accept it or understand it but guys DO know what they want. Sometimes we over analyze everything because we want something to be that may or may not be there. Here are a few reasons why things may not be going according to your plan for the man of your dreams, key word ‘YOUR’:
1) He doesn’t like you– Yes, I’m sorry but I had to tell you. It doesn’t matter if he flirts with you or shares his chips with you. If a guy wants your number, he will ask you for it. If he wants you as his girlfriend, he WILL let you know.
2) He’s been messing around– Let’s say he did ask you for your number, maybe you guys went out a few times, he might’ve even professed some feelings for you. Now he says he’s confused or the phone calls/text messages have stopped. What happened?! He might be messing around with someone else or you guys took it too far. He may be in a place where he got what he wanted or just enough to satisfy him for now. Another reason why you leave the physical for after marriage. Repent, forgive yourself, and move on. Guys cannot be pushed into a relationship.
3) He’s not there yet– He may need time. So what do you do? Well I’ll tell you what you won’t do, and that’s wait. Continue with your life. When I finally met my husband, I was busy doing things. It’s an attractive quality and will keep you from turning needy if you do end up in a relationship.
There is a reason why the bible says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing…” (Proverbs 18:22). It doesn’t say she, it doesn’t say her Mama, it doesn’t say Facebook, it doesn’t say her friends, it says, ‘HE’. Yes, this means you have to wait. Click here for ideas on what to do while you are waiting.
Remember, you are worth waiting for and your husband is worth waiting for. God has someone for you even YOU couldn’t dream up. I could’ve never dreamed up my husband. The Lord knew exactly what I wanted but most of all exactly what I needed. He knows the same for you too. Don’t settle!
Basket of Blessings!
Jesus, family, ministry, and lots of coffee! My heart comes from being a young teen girl who didn’t know much and found Jesus in a dark time. My ministry focuses on the heart of God for this generation to make Godly decisions especially in the area of purity. A blog for all ages because God’s Word is eternal and has no age limit!